Thursday, October 25, 2007

Home Ownership and Stinky Stuff

Whoever coined the phrase "the joys of home ownership" either never owned a home or has a sick sense of humor.

My parents are down to visit for a week, which is usually a good thing (I don't see them often). Today during a walk around the yard, my father and I just happened to look at the water meter and noticed the meter moving with no water being used. After some water-diagnostics we discovered a break in my water service. Same place as in my former house in Sugar Land -- a brass-to-PVC plastic fitting broke where it threads into the brass fitting. The good news: We've dug a hole and it's obvious where it is. The bad news: It isn't something that's going to be easily fixed (at least not without numerous trips to Home Depot and lots of digging). So until the professionals can get here in the morning, the water is off except for absolute necessities.

Don't let anyone fool you: New(er) houses are not problem-free houses. My house is 11 years old. I'm just about to spend a bunch to have a lot of rotten trim replaced. The yard has cost mucho dinero to maintain. The air conditioner has already had expensive repairs, and the water heater is about to take a one-way trip to water heater heaven. I won't even mention the unmentionable electrical wiring in this house (thankfully that I could fix myself). This blasted house cost me more than the older house I owned. The only joy in home ownership that I have is my next door neighbor (her name is Joy).

It seems that there's another group of people trying to "fix" a different kind of problem: Specifically, replacing the nice lack of smell in fresh air with the stinky smell of perfumes. My parents use fabric softener on their clothes - the perfume smell in there is strong enough to make my throat sore. The smell never goes away. This is supposed to make the clothes smell "fresh." News flash: No, it doesn't. It smells like a bottle of cheap perfume was dumped into a pile of clothes (and this isn't far from the truth). I have a bottle of Lysol Bathroom Cleaner - "Island Breeze" scent. I don't know where this "island" is, but no island I've ever visited ever smelled like this and never for so long (like upwards of a week). Maybe they're talking about outside a cheap perfume factory on Staten Island or something? The biggest liars are the people who make Fabreze. They claim it doesn't cover odors, but rather it eliminates them. Oh, really? This shit is just another product loaded with perfumes that not only leaves a perfume-loaded residue on the furniture, but transfers to people's clothes as well. Good god people, do you need perfume in EVERYTHING? What ever happened to the lack of smell of stuff? If you have a sensitive schnoz and these perfumes cause your throat to close-up, what do you do? It's hard to find any cleaning or personal care product without some kind of perfume odor. Even frigging garbage bags are scented now. I'd rather smell cat feces than perfume. Give me back my fresh air.

So I guess this posting truly stinks today. Thank goodness that no perfumes were used in its production.

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